February 14, 2009~~3:14 p.m.
ten years.

I hate this day.

It has nothing to do with the Valentine's Day part. Nothing to do with the commercialization of love. Nothing to do with chocolate or kisses or the delicious combination of the two.

Everything do to with... mom baggage.

Ten years ago today was the last day that I saw my mom outside of a hospital bed.

Ten.YEARS.

That is a long flippin' time.

She was already sick, but they didn't know what was wrong and certainly no one had any idea that inside her body, something was killing her. A week later, I'd get the call telling me she'd been admitted to the hospital for tests. Two weeks later, I'd come home from a night class to have the husband tell me that she died.

This part of the year has been the bane of my existance for the last decade. It shreds me every. single. year. Even after all this time, I question how I have possibly managed to go on without the ONE person who was always on my team.

And so, today begins my little, annual, mental reenactment/self-torture.

Such fun. not.

~Alice