January 16, 2002~~4:55 p.m.
Spring and being ten...

Okay, I'm ready for spring. The sun was out today reminding me that I want it to be warm. I'm tired of turtlenecks and tights. I want naked legs and lower necklines. I want to roll my windows down. I want my tan-line back.

It's so hard this time of year because for some reason I start to trick myself into thinking that it's almost spring when it really isn't. I'm ready for the flowers to bloom. To see everyone's yards planted with brand new annuals. For the lawns to return to their beautiful deep greens.

Elle told me yesterday that she thinks it's pretty weird how it all depends on that dumb groundhog and whether he sees his shadow. It's always just when I think she's growing up too fast that she says something out of the blue that makes me well aware of how immature ten can be. Of course those moments are not as frequent as the ones that remind me how disturbingly mature ten has become since I was there.

I wish I could make ten-year-olds understand that they really don't want to grow up. That responsibility isn't as fun as it looks. That being the parents isn't all about ice cream and movies whenever you want them. That, for the most part, it's about mortgages and alarm clocks and worrying about your kids growing up too damn fast. But those things don't make sense to kids. I'm not too old to remember that.

~Alice