January 14, 2007~~9:15 p.m.
Caution: Old Person in Development.

My grandmother was a terrible passenger in the car, always nervous, hands clenched, holding on, seeming terrified. And that was just in the five or so blocks between their house and church. Most of the time we walked or took the bus. I'm guessing my grandpa liked it better that way.

I always thought it was because she'd never had a license. Never driven a car at all. She didn't even know how to ride a bike. But when my mom hit her mid-thirties, she started getting more nervous in the passenger seat too. She was afraid she was turning into my grandmother, but it didn't stop her from being a pretty unpleasant person to drive around with.

I don't have to ride on the right hand side of the car very often. Generally, if we're all going somewhere together, I drive. It's always been that way. But I've never really liked driving at night very much and in the last few years it seems to be getting more distressing for me so if we're coming back from somewhere late, I let the husband take the wheel.

Such was the case tonight when we left Reno around 7pm.

And... oh my god... I am turning into my grandma.

I already don't really like the 80 through the mountains, but in the dark it's much worse. And everyone seems to drive like they're convinced they've memorized every bump and curve in the road and like it would be IMPOSSIBLE to encounter a stray patch of snow or a bit of ice in the road.

I tried REALLY hard to be silent. To ignore the fact that I thought the husband was going too fast. To trust his judgement even though he seemed to be WAY too far over in the lane. I tried, honestly, I did. But I couldn't keep it up.

The husband takes it well, given how irritating I'm sure it is to have someone else tell you how to drive a car when you've been driving for 25+ years. I can only assume that as I get worse, his patience will diminish. And it sucks to know that this is what the future holds for us if we ever want to go anywhere when it's dark outside.

Maybe we can work around it before we make each other crazy... or maybe he can just shoot me with a tranquilizer dart like they do when they need to move animals from one place to another. That'd be fun to explain to the grandkids as he's chasing me around the yard when it's getting to be time to leave their birthday parties...

~Alice